So I fancied a nice long soak in the bath in the middle of the day.
What of it?
One of the few advantages of living alone is that I can do what the fuck I want, when I feel like it. The same goes for eating and drinking.
Actually, now that I come to think of it, it IS rather nice that there's nobody trying to call me up or wondering where I am or what I'm doing all the time;
nobody filling every square inch of the bathroom with crap and making my bath stink of rotting fruit and washing powder (yes, Ame, I dated a Lush addict);
nobody saying "You've got thousands of books, what do you want another one for?";
nobody throwing a strop and scoring fucking points;
nobody saying "You're not thinking of wearing that, are you?";
nobody to moan that it's black and white or it's got subtitles;
nobody shouting, swearing, abusing and slapping me around every fourth week while expecting me to be angelic and supportive about it, yet never once apologising … ever;
nobody to stop me drinking scotch in bed;
nobody to scream at me for ironing her silk blouse on cotton setting;
nobody to stop me following that police car round and round Norwich with a fucking great spliff on the go;
nobody putting their COLD feet on my nice warm tummy in the middle of the night;
Hmm … perhaps this dating business is all just a cunning and fiendish trap set by weemen to get me to cook and clean and iron for them … Damn my stupid penis for getting turned on by nice perky little boobs …
Anyway, back to my lovely hot, slightly overfilled bath … Brew up some yummy Cuban coffee and relax … Mmmmmm …
Today is a Hunky Dory day (thanks, Rich), so Hunky Dory goes on repeat play in the studio, whilst just down the landing I settle in to my wonderfully unperfumed bathwater and get to work on becoming seriously wrinkly.
Before I get in, I check my bum cheeks for the telltale signs of alien abduction and anal probing after reading Ame's mysterious description of her own experience (check Saturday's comments).
The upshot of all this crap is that I get to thinking about bathtub music, so when I get out, I click on the "play count" in iTunes and am genuinely shocked at what it says about my age.
Crikey!
Most of the top few hundred tracks (we're talking over 90Gig of music collected over forty-eight years) are stuck firmly in the seventies … The SEVENTIES! The decade taste forgot! The decade that saw the death of the mini skirt and the rise of flares. Fucking hell!
This is alarming. If you wander on over to my profile, you'll see the kind of music I actually profess to liking. And that's not it.
The seventies! Shame on me. Although I suppose it was my teenage years, so it must have been pretty formative (newer readers: check back on old Dive's musical history) …
Having said that; Bowie, Steely Dan, Joni Mitchell all loom large, together with Dylan and the Beatles leaking over from the sixties; then there's Jeff Beck's Blow By Blow album (the only record of guitar music ever made that is actually listenable), Marvin Gaye's "What's Goin' On", Elton, Zep, Beefheart, Neil Young, Zappa, a fair bit of (ahem) prog, some punk of course …
Actually, I'm not so ashamed now I look at it. That's some damned fine music.
Let's have a belated hoorah for the seventies!
The puzzling thing is that ever since it first came out in 1979, one song has been stuck in my head.
It's like it's been hard-wired into my brain.
I mean we've all got songs running through our heads pretty much all of the time, right? Yet whenever I'm too busy or distracted I find my brain reverts to default and there's ALWAYS the same fucking song there.
And it's Joni Mitchell's "Sweet Sucker Dance" off her Mingus album.
WHY?
It's not as if I have any particular attachment to the song; it's not even close to being one of Joni's best. But there it is … all the time … stuck in my head.
And it's not exactly something I can sing along to, or even dance to …
Somehow it just got hard-wired in there. My brain's default song … Weird …
So. This calls for a mini-assignment:
Question 1:
Does your iTunes "Play Count" say anything surprising or embarrassing about you?
And please be honest.
Question 2:
Do you have a song that's "hard-wired" into your brain? Again, be honest rather than trying to be cool …
And Question 3:
Given the small list of examples above, am I really sure that I want a girlfriend?
31 comments:
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn...hey! Do I really have you all to myself? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...nice for a Sunday morn...and how sweet to see my name in Divey lights! ;) Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn...again...streeeeeeeeeeeeeetch...I'll be back deary...need to grab a cup o' tea and check the mirror to see what lovely shades my bruise has taken on...and then I'll be back to harass you. You IRON!!?? SCORE! ;)
Yup, I iron, I cook, I clean, I remove spiders, I unblock drains, I come with several useful attachments and my batteries ARE included.
Still can't get a date though …
Enjoy your cuppa.
Do you also like to wear blindfolds? Did I really SAY that Dive?!? Don't know what's gotten into me...OH NO! Ya THINK? Don't even THINK it...a-l-i-e-n...a-b-d-u--NOOOOOOOOOOO! Hang on, let me take a sip of my "cuppa"...carry on whilst I do...and do tell about your attachments...and don't even get me started on batteries...good lord, it's only 9AM!!! And you'll recognise me...no problem...I'll tell ya how later! ;)
Blindfolds? No, but I did date a lovely girl who was really into bondage.
But that's not for this blog.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm...glue & duct tape...very kinky Dive...should have hung onto her...or at least taped your legs together so she couldn't get away! ;) Are we stirring up enough trouble here? Hope we don't scare away your regulars...if they'd ever get home from CHURCH and POST! ;) Hey, I'm just fine with twosomes!
Hmm. Questions. I'll start with #3 because seriously, I have been thinking Question #2 for a several days, and I was thinking about writing a little piece about it. So, #3: as I was reading your revelling about being alone and unhindered, I was trying to decide if you really meant those things or if you were just trying to convince yourself that you did. I'm afraid I don't know you well enough to make that decision. Although, when you have found the person you really connect with, all those idiosyncrosies (spell?) are relatively insignficant, unless the person pops their gum.
Question #1: my iTunes/iPod is a mess--a folder for James Taylor, a folder for horn favorites which is the largest folder, a folder for pieces performed by my orchestra, a folder for The Chieftains, and a folder for odds and ends like Nanci Griffith and Mandy Patinkin singing show tunes.
1. I don't use all that, but i have a playlist on my laptop, including an unhealthy amount of Celine Dion and more of Barbra Streisand, since i love to sing, myself and use these to sing along and practise. I'm sure lots of people would say these are embarrassing. Really, do i look bothered?
2. Stand by me, and a song i wrote called 'Woman'.
3. Yes i think you do still want a gf and i agree with all the advantages of being on your own, for sure, except the advantages of sharing your life with a special someone are somewhat more.
TOTALLY with you on the comment about a thousand books and why would you want more. My ex husband used to say it and i used to be dumbfounded - it just makes not a shred of sense to me!
and quite honestly Dive, i really have no idea why you don't have someone already, with all those talents and qualities. Seriously.
I think you stirred them into action, Ame. Hee hee …
Robyn:
Looking forward to your Q2 piece.
As for Q1; go to your main library in iTunes and hit the Play Count button. It's scary yet revealing.
Lynn: Okay, Babs could sing, but as my gay mate Andy is a HUGE Babs fan I'll not comment further on her … but CELINE DION? (Sorry, I'm a musician; it's just a natural reaction we have). EW!
Q2: Excellent.
Q3: Maybe you're right. Perhaps I shouldn't be extending the house to make a library, I should really be putting in another bathroom with a HUGE extract fan for women's stinky bath stuff.
As to your last point, I'm getting a bit fed up with the dateless years flying past; I'm beginning to think there's some kind of conspiracy and all the women in the country are tittering into their hands behind my back.
Oh well …
No, don't get rid of the books, ever. I succumbed to the comments and sold a lot of them, i regret it now... one bottle of good bath stuff is sufficient i find... lol.
Nobody's sniggering, they're just plain stupid if you ask me. If i were single....
OMG DIVE! Well THAT 'splains it ALL...you didn't TELL us you had a gay MATE! Better toss him (pun intended!) before you bring home a new girl! LOL! Sorry, I read EVERYTHING into NOTHING! And let's see...
Q1 ~ It tells me that I can't believe I listened to "Wanna Be" by Luce (a local SF band) 335 times! I need couch time!
Q2 ~ Yep! A NEW one...how's that for spontaneous..nothing from my past...of long looooooooong ago...AND it's by a British group, OASIS and is called "She Is Love"...sweet, catchy tune...
Q3 ~ You definitely NEED a significant other...girl? Boy? That's for YOU to figure out...(see the beginning of this post!)
Hehehehehehe...sorry, must be a full MOON! (with a BRUISE!) I've never misbehaved this badly in my enTIRE life!
=)))
Hee hee … Thanks, Lynn. You're too kind.
And Ame; all my friends are musicians or artists or both (plus one librarian), so there's a pretty even mix of gay and hetero in there.
Q1: I'll look that one up. The old "Play Count" button certainly throws up some surprises.
Q2: I've just searched my 90 plus Gigs of music and I've only got one Oasis tune (that's one more than I've got of U2 - certain bands just grate for me). What a grouch.
Q3: A woman, definitely, although now I come to think of it, my house is nicely decorated and full of books and paintings and … er … Tiffany lamps and … um … there's a lovely wall hanging at the top of the stairs … Yikes!
For your questions:
1). No, not really. Other than I may be a closet lesbian, but that doesn't really either surprise or bother me, or anyone else for that matter.
2). Sometimes, yes, but rarely the same song. I think it only happens to me when that particular song somehow symbolizes something going on in my life (check out the "s" alliteration in that sentence...).
3). Only if she doesn't invade the parts of your lifestyle that you truly like.
I remember when I lived alone, and I SO VERY MUCH miss those things, too. Right now, I'd like to take a nap. Now, yes, I was out late last night and that probably has something to do with it. However, I won't take the damn nap because SOMEONE in this house will either make a comment as to why I am sleeping or will assume that perhaps I actually went out drinking and my nap is symbolic of a hangover (trust me, G-rated evening there).
A bath sounds good though...
I'm answering question #3 first. I love living alone, for most of the reasons you mention, just in reverse. One major problem Ex-Boyfriend and I had was how to spend "morning time" (after the obvious). My idea is to lounge around a bit, especially on weekends, drinking coffee and such. His idea was to get up and go out straight away. Compromise was hard here, for both of us. Still, I'd trade a little fight about Sunday morning for some companionship.
And, I love seventies music, too. Joni is amazing.
Here are my recently played songs:
Wasp Nest, the National (I'm listening to the National now, so it's not surprising---I love them)
Drug Test, Yo La Tengo (the song I quote at the top of my blog---and about the best example of indie garage rock ever)
Ramble On, Led Zeppelin (my favorite Zep song)
The Fairest of the Seasons, Nico (no shock here)
OK, here's embarassing, Who's Schooling Who? by Schooly D (can't help it---love that one)
Blood, the Editors
Twin Cinema, the New Pornographers
She Sells Sanctuary, the Cult
Little Red Corvette, Prince
Aside from the Schooly D, there's not much that surprises me there (well, except that Joni Mitchell wasn't in there, because I have a lot of her stuff loaded)
#2 Songs hard-wired into my brain... Yes, but I feel like a schizo, because I have different songs for different eras and moods. There are a lot of them.
Hi, SLS: I love alliteration.
As for people in the house, I rather like what Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter have done with their marriage; they bought neighbouring houses in London and just put in a connecting door. One house is all Tim, the other all Helena. Lots of privacy but they're there when they need one another.
Trouble is, my house doesn't have another one near it.
Kate: Yes, I iron.
Well who else is going to do it? Or the housework, or the gardening, or the cooking, or anything else.
Sassy: Great songs.
My favourite sunday morning "after the obvious" activity is just to snuggle back down under the duvet together and "lay in bed and stink" for a while.
These days though, I just get up and do housework.
Yes, I do miss that.
STINK? DIVE! You need a LUSH sex bath bomb then! See? ;) Morning! It's still night over here...and it's still young! Ready for that commute? Have an awesome day! Can't wait for your next post! =)))
1. I don't have one of those magic music computer things
2. A song that goes 'we could live on mashed potatoes, beer, and leave the shitty neighbours behind'.
3. Um, probably not really. It's not, like, the law, that you have to be with someone, you know.
Ame:
Boy are you gonna have jetlag when you get over here.
I do NOT envy you that!
Spinny: I know it's not mandatory, but some bits of it are nice. And it's been so many years, I'd like to find out if it's as nice as I remember before my memory fades completely.
And hey, at least you got a snog last year; that's one more than I got.
(1) I don't have any truck with iTunes and am just coming to terms with those new fangled stereograms which in my opinion will never catch on.
(2) Unfortunately I have hundreds of songs hardwired into my brain, which means there's not enough room for anything else. Since you mentioned Hunky Dory, and since David Bowie is 60 today, I should say that Oh You Pretty Things is one of them.
(3) By the sound of it, no. Nothing wrong with being single, even if society has conditioned us to believe there is. It should be noted, however, that not all women are braindead harpies who turn into axe murderers every four weeks. Some of them might actually watch black and white films with subtitles, even!
Yes, laying in bed together on a Sunday morning is just fab but i'm with Ame on the stink thing. Goodness, Dive, how to turn a girl off? Lay in bed with a clean disposition please LOL.
Read through this post again and you know it's obvious that you are feeling the opposite of that which you write. My Lord, thou dost protest too much.
Hoorah for you, Betty, you Pretty Thing.
I must admit, I've still got a stack of 78s, though to my shame I've digitised a lot of them for the iPod.
Unfortunately, most of the women in my life came straight out of the box marked "Ming The Menstrual". It would be so nice to find one who didn't use me as an emotional and physical punchbag.
Although a woman like that who also likes the odd foreign movie has yet to evolve on my planet …
Lynn: "Lie in bed and stink" was just a phrase an old girlfriend used for "sod the housework, get back here under the duvet."
As for feeling the opposite of what I write; this blog has always had its tongue firmly in its cheek.
And one can never protest too much.
I just read through some of the comments I missed (Dive, you know how to bring in the comments with your topics!)
1. I love the "lay in bed and stink" notion, but then I understood the meaning.
2. I don't know many women who become banshees every four weeks. I do know some who use it as excuse to act without reproach, but it's only an excuse. A little self control goes a long way.
3. There is one other song I forgot on my own post, now that we're talking about 78s. My mother had a collection of them, and a song that comes to mind quite often: Got a rocket in my pocket/I'm walkin' on air/got a rocket in my pocket/I could fly most anywhere...
Perhaps not use the word "stink," but the idea is excellent.
question 1: er, kajagoogoo. say no more.
question 2: legacy by push (trance track)
question 3: only you can answer that, mate.
I finally got around to checkingi the play count. Mostly Beethoven's Horn Sonata with Barry Tuckwell on horn because I'm studying it. Also, the Decemberists--my daughter put it on my iTunes but I like.
I do that to Mum, too.
I slip odd things onto her iTunes and see if she notices.
She usually likes them (usually) …
I've never had the four week harridan from hell thing either though lots of my girl friends have and most men seem to have had the back hand of it. Odd. Robyn we're similar i think. lol.
Oh and Dive i love french films.
Oh, don't!
You've just got me thinking of la Belle Noiseuse …
um the song that's always in my head is "Saturday Night" by the Bay City Rollers. remember: S A T U R D A Y night?
NO RICH!
Please don;t do this to me!
It's bedtime and I'll have it stuck in my head all night!
AAAAAAAAAUUUUGHHH!!!
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