Dive's Dining Room (click for bigger table)As a consequence of which I've drooled my weight in saliva.
The rice steamer's on. I'm making どんぶり for lunch because I'm bloody starving.
While I'm waiting for that; the girls hit back after yesterday's comment-fest, wanting to know what I'm looking for in a woman.
Well I had a good think and wrote out a list, but it very quickly became prohibitively restrictive.
So I have two choices: I can write my shopping list out for you to guffaw at and snort derision upon, or I could just say "anything that still twitches when you kick it."
As for the girls' answers to my own question; all of those things (with the possible exceptions of the blatantly materialistic items) are admirable qualities is a man but I bet my bottom dollar that none of you would date a man who had all of those qualities if he happened to be "differently attractive", like myself.
So I'll revise my "what I'm looking for in a woman" list.
Now it's "any woman who would actually date me".
Don't hold your breath … I've been looking for forty-eight years …
18 comments:
Ooh, look at the books on the shelves!!
Would I date a delightful person who was "differently attractive", as you put it? You know, when you're young and idealistic, you have expections on what a person should look like. But after you have lived a few decades, and you are more capable of sorting out the significant from the insignificant, your definition of attractive changes.
And all the stories you hear about people becoming attached over the internet without ever having met, you realize that the face doesn't really mean all that much. It's fleeting. Example, Robert Mitchum was one hell of a good looking man in his early years. But when he got old, not so much.
For goodness' sake, Dive. Do we have to play this game again, where you put your looks down and I contradict you???
have you ever heard the sage wisdom that when there's two people in the room, there are actually six? Each person as they see themselves, each person as the other sees them and each as they really are.
I think I'd like to see two of those people meet - the way you see yourself and the way others see you - if you didn't cancel each other out in some kind of Adamsian puff of logic, you'd probably get on quite well, being so different!!!
Some interesting thoughts, Robyn. In my old age, I can't help believing that when we meet someone new we idealise them to some extent. This idealisation obviously wanes as people get to know each other better. I think that when people meet over the Internet, that there's much more of an opportunity to idealise, and so the relationships that strike up can be more intense.
I hope you're right, Robyn, but I see precious little to reassure me.
Perhaps if I were to walk around with a placard saying "Hey, Girls! I've got a good job and can cook and dispose of spiders" …
Unfortunately, first impressions seem to count for a HUGE amount, however much women deny it.
You lot are kind because you know me fairly well (Peahen, very well), but when I meet a woman for the first time I've still got the awful first impression problem.
Bugger …
Oh, and as for the books, Robyn: the rest of the room is floor to ceiling books all round … as are most of the other rooms in the house … and the attic.
I like books …
I dunno, the ability to make someone laugh makes a man at least fifty per cent more attractive. Add another twenty five per cent if they have a Welsh accent (... but that's just a personal thing).
Bollocks, I don't have the right to pass judgement here, what with being married and being over thirty five (the age at which women cease to be fanciable - if we're being generous. Actually, at forty three I'm fast approaching the age when I become a figure of ridicule instead, but that's another story ...)
You're still a kid to me, Betty you young filly.
And making girls laugh is easy once you know them, but try it on a stranger and they tend to run away, calling for the police.
We're back to first impressions again. How the fuck do I get as far as having the CHANCE to make a girl laugh?
Beats me …
Betty, I'm in the same boat, being married and 44, graying hair, mommy pants, and all. But this stage of life adds an important dimension to the discussion of attraction.
Peahen, very good point about the nature of internet relationships. You are right about the way people can idealise, and in the medium of the internet, you only know what the person will show you. You don't really get to see the other person interact with the world.
One more thing, Dive. When you say we know you well, we don't really, outside of Peahen. We only know a few sides and layers, because we all just dole out little bits of ourselves. Good God, if I were to blabber absolutely everything about myself on my site and in comment boxes, I'd be committed. hee hee.
Mommy pants … Hee hee …
44 Robyn? Good God you look about twelve - and in a GOOD way.
Well Dive, um, so it's really first impressions is it. I still maintain that it's not looks for every girl. So you have to think what else is forming that first impression. Do you bypass the intro, cackling loudly with a sexist joke? Do you ask if they would still twitch if you kicked them? Do you do the self-deprecating thing on the first line? See, the way i see it is less is more. Sometimes it's interesting just to catch a look from someone who is across a room, then to bump into them later on. The full-on approach rarely does it i think. Also i think you might be trying too hard, in that it's always on your mind. Right, tonight i'll meet someone new. Who's here that i like the look of? Maybe just chill a bit and it will happen without even trying. What are you doing tonight? lol i can't , but that's not to say i wouldn't if i could. If you would, that is, if i could. Perhaps you wouldn't? LOL you see how the doubtful thing crosses to others? Do tell us that list Dive, we won't snigger will we girls? No we promise. We'll just tell you what's realistic in our humble views.
by the way i didn't even mention because it seems so ridiculous, but i will. What on earth do you think's wrong with your looks? NOthing that i can see.
Well at least you have a nice looking pad. You should see the pig-sty I live in.
Dive, I have no idea what I want, and I certainly don't know what men want. One of my close friends just got dumped by a guy who said that he was really happy with how things were going, so I really don't know what to say.
We'll figure it out.
And, your home is gorgeous.
Lynn, I have quite looked my age, although I have to say here that the picture I drag around with my comments is about two years old. I have gotten considerably grayer, and today I think I look extremely tired. I don't have a more current picture, though. I hate cameras.
We're sure you look lovely Robyn. Get that camera going; we want to see!
By the way i keep changing mine as it keeps disappearing out of my control so when i upload it again (every few days it seems) i get bored and choose another! Current one please Robyn. And Dive too! Why not.
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