Baps And Peepees Part 3

Yaay! The British Museum! Don'tcha just love that roof?

Ame and Bear outside the Reading Room. Ame goes off to the café to buy hugely overpriced water while Bear and me head for the loo, where we find - inevitably - a drinking fountain.

Haven't these two watched any "Mummy" movies?
I swear the one on the left was creaking open as we left.

We head upstairs to the South East Asia section. There's some good stuff from Indonesia and Bear turns museum guide and gives us the lowdown on the migration of Hinduism down through South East Asia to Indonesia, followed by Bhuddism.

Whilst Ame is Ame … Hee hee.

While the boys are busy talking history, Ame wanders off to the slightly ruder Indian sculptures.
From the far end of the gallery comes the cry, "Woah! Baps! … Baps and peepees!"

Before we get thrown out, we hunt down the Rosetta Stone.
One of Ame and Bear's boys is studying this at school so it's cool to see the real thing.
It's also nice to see it in February, when the crowds aren't twenty deep all around it.
That's Ame looking at the back … which is kinda blank.

Now we're getting to the big stuff. Bear (a one man history faculty) tells us the history of the crowns of the Upper and Lower Kingdoms in Egypt and he has plenty of examples to illustrate his points. He would make a great lecturer …

… except he gets kinda sidetracked by the weemen (hee hee).
"Okay, now move your hands up like you're cupping his peepee … Now smile!"

Then we head off to see the Elgin Marbles.
We Brits were pretty good at just marching into a country and stealing stuff. You can just hear Lord Elgin: "Ooh! Nice temple! I'm having that!"
I mean yes; you can understand nicking the odd statue, but a whole temple?

And here's one of our most disgusting crimes:
The Parthenon, right? You know it? One of the world's most beautiful and sacred buildings.
Here's Lord Elgin again …
"Wow! Look at those statues all round that old temple! You, get a saw; you, fetch me a big hammer!"
And he ripped them all off the Parthenon and stole them! What an ass-hat!
I'm with the Greeks on this one. Give 'em back, you thieving gits.

Ame, of course, is looking for baps and peepees. Here are some nice baps.

And a horsie! Don't look behind it for horse poo, Ame.

And here are Bear and Ame in the Parthenon Room in the British Museum in February.
There are just the three of us in there. Don't bother coming here in the summer, you'll never get in. This is the time of year to do museums.

More baps.

The rest of this episode might get a bit boring for those of you (unlike Bear and me) who don't get horny thinking of the Assyrians (all together, Python fans: "Up and down like the bleedin' Assyrian Empire.")
Here's a gate sphynx from Sargon's Palace. Cool!

But do tune in for the final episode where Ame morphs into Lara Croft and finds the Holy Grail (true)!
Here she's just wondering why this guy has a poo on his head.

Ahhh … There are rooms and rooms of this stuff. All sawn off the palace walls by us thieving Brits; but probably a good thing in this case as the Yanks would have bombed the shit out of them if we'd left 'em there.
This is the Lion Hunt of Ashurbanipal. If this stuff doesn't get you wet, look away now.

Fabulous bas relief detailing. Okay, so I've got a stiffy. What of it?

And we'll finish with more horsies for Ame. If I posted all of my photos it would take days. Just go there yourself and enjoy it all.
And tune in next time for misbehavin' Ame. Yaay!