I've had enough.
It's not just today; I've been feeling a little disheartened for a while now (about four hours sleep over the past ten days hasn't helped); the low self-esteem monster has been crawling out from under the bed to tell me maybe I really am just a worthless piece of shit.
I'm going to go see Katie in London tomorrow and hopefully I'll come back refreshed and cheerful.
Then I'll sit down and decide whether writing this crap every day is worth all the effort or not.
Either there'll be a bunch of happy photos of Katie in London or I'll get the fuck out of Blogville.
I really don't know.
Right now I'm just heartily sick of it all.
25 comments:
I'm sorry Dive. :(
I hate that low self-esteem monster. Where does it come from, I wonder. You can be going along just fine, and then "BOOM!" There it is telling you how much you suck at everything. I like to beat mine with a big stick, but it only works as a deterant. I have not been able to completely kill the thing yet.
I hope it goes away for you soon, Dive, and that you back to us raring to go.
Cheer up, Dive! My cousin Katie is coming to see you tomorrow and is ready to hit the town! Be prepared!
Hey Dive!!! I hope you get a good night's sleep, because I'm sure we'll have a blast tomorrow. If you have nothing but more down in the dumps attitude by the end of the day tomorrow, then I think California will revoke my citizenship. Like totally!!! See you soon!!
Come on, Dive, you're made of sterner stuff than that. We need your guide tours - Katie'll be great fun I bet - we need your wit and we even need your rants! I'm looking forward to those pics. Cheer up x we don't always have the same views, but we've agreed on that riverside chat with books etc. Don't you stand me up!
Dive - you bring laughter, sarcasm, disrespect, irreverence, naughty words, new words, moaning, mumbling, muttering, masticating and music - my day is better after touching base with you my friend so get your head out of ya bum, put on your best rags and give that Kool Katie one hell of a Divine Day with Dive - we are all soooo jealous of her - meow!!!
Dive,
If you need a few days to recoup do it! We all need breaks from time to time. You are the most consistent blogger I know.
I've been visited by that monster quite a bit lately. My new classroom is directly across from the creative cooking lab. The aromas waft in and the nice students leave me freshly baked goodies. At my age the smell alone causes me to gain weight! Extra pounds kill my self-esteem. But please don't quit blogging. I'd miss you terribly. You help my self-esteem every time you visit my blog. I haven't visited yours in a few days so I have to read all your recent posts.
Ah...those black dogs are showing their teeth aqain, yes?
And, you know...sometimes you just hit a wall. When I get to the point where I have to force myself to sit down at the computer at night, that is when I get up and go read instead. And it helps that Bing nags me to death if I spend more than one hour per day on the computer.
Balance is what helps. So..if you need to step back for a while, by all means, do it. But, come back..okay? And let me know if you'd be okay with my e-mail address and I will send it to you so that I DO NOT LOSE YOU. Because that would make my heart a little sad.
Now listen here old son.
You are the BEST- and if you don't acknowledge that simple fact you'll have Auntie Jack on your doorstep pronto.
When you see Californian Katie tomorrow, give her a huge hug from me and say we're sorry to have missed her in Paris. We did look out on the quai at the Gare du Nord for her, but sadly we missed each other.
Then we want to see you guys yelling and laughing; otherwise we'll send Jules over with her big stick and Lynn who's visit can be brought forward any time we say.
We have girls just waiting to straighten you at a moments notice, so be warned. We all love you too much to put up with all this crap and sh*t.
Grosses bisous - from the two of us; and DO have a blast tomorrow.
I hope you had fun with Katie, Dive. Easy does it dear friend. Pain and lack of sleep - whoa, ditto! Doesn't make for a good combo particularly when you have a big day in London planned.
Sorry if we were a bit bruising, we get a bit defensive when you hit our raw nerves.
Once you get over the back thing, your self-esteem will return.
As for quitting blogging - no dear Dive, simply not possible; we'd be heartbroken and especially me because you visit me nearly every day, bless you.
Feel loved dear Dive because you are.
YOU, dive are what's holding US all together here in this swamp so you cannot just take your toys and go home.
BOLLIX!!!!
"Then I'll sit down and decide whether writing this crap every day is worth all the effort or not."
Indeed it is. Not only because it's interesting 'crap', but because sometimes it makes MY day (among other's as observed in previous comments)... even if your day has not been 'made' by anything positive. =)
Rich said it, just in fewer words.
Tomorrow is tomorrow. The past was, but never will be again.
You belong and you know it.
Hey Dive stupid, every time you need an ego boost and shot of happiness, just go back to m.benaut's account of his stay with you. Reading him was a real ray of sunshine.
Dive - M and I are selling everything and moving to a remote mountain top and becoming wacky recluses. Come with us. If that doesn't work I'm going to call the doctor to up my meds so I just don't give a shite anymore!
{{{DIVE}}} Big cyber hug dude - Love ya!
Well, fuck me, Boss. If you're giving up blogging every day, then I am too!
Write when it feels good and when it feels right for you. And do it even when it doesn't.
I am hatching a cunning plan to go to Scotland for my 40th next July. Nothing to do with your post, but wanted to book you in for a wee trip around London.
I've missed you :(
Yeah. What Nathalie said. :)
don't make me ditch the MITM and come over there and marry you, sugar! xoxox
Illegitimus non carborundum est, Dive! If Katie can't cheer you up, there's no hope! Have a great day on Wednesday.
Dive
Aren't you too busy?
Take a break. Alone and far away
of everyone and everything.
I reckon you need to look at the sleepless bit, old son.
A large number of us will agree that blogging and sleeping are strange bedfellows.
I often hit the sack at 3AM so I'm used to it or rather I can identify it.
Sometimes however there is no wick left to burn at either end. That's when the middle burns out.
Blogger burn-out then compounds because you feel a responsibility to the punters.
Setting a cracking pace is an adrenalin rush but keeping the rod to the back gets the brain telling you stuff you don't at first recognize.
Take a break, restore the sleeping pattern and the ole Dive we love so much will be back on deck when the time comes.
Hugs, mate; even the BEST need a rest.
Where am I going to get new recipes if you throw in the towel? You have too much talent and to not share would be a shame. I look forward to your next posting.
Dive, I'd miss you terribly! Please don't stop writing : ( It's good therapy and reminds us all of how human we are. To be human is to feel like crap sometimes. To feel that great about yourself all the time is inhuman and egotistic.
I hope you get good friend and laugh therapy and return refreshed!
Check out Dive's nice day in London with Katie at Katie's blog. Click on Katiefornia on Dive's list.
I'll marry you too - really!!!
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