Black And White

I found this on our Scout's blog earlier.
Some guy has made a list (admittedly tongue in cheek) of "things white people like and use to set themselves apart".

Now that's just asking for it.
I just spent over an hour on the videolink chatty thing, filling in the answers with Andy, the guy who sits next to me at work and who is decidedly not white (he's Ghanaian), to see how we fared.
So … without further ado, here are the results:

#104 Girls with bangs
Hokay. bad start. Both Andy and I like girls with bangs.
And of course bangs with girls, natch.

#103 Sweaters
We both wear them.

#102 Children’s Games as Adults
Hey, we both love GTA4 on our PS3s.

#101 Being Offended
Andy gets understandably offended by racists; I get offended by the whole human race.

#100 Bumper Stickers
We both raised our eyebrows at this one. Neither of us are American so we don't have them.

#99 Grammar
Sheesh! I thought I would win this one for whitey but Andy (a multi-linguist) is if anything even more pedantic than I am.

#98 The Ivy League
Er … The Ivy League were an English pop group in the early 1960s. I think they later became the Flowerpot Men in hippy times. As neither of us could remember any of their songs we'll have to skip this one.

#97 Scarves
Andy wears scarves. I keep one rolled up in my bag to use as a pillow on the train.

#96 New Balance Shoes
What the fuck are they?

#95 Rugby
Ah! We are both rugby fans but Andy plays, too, so he wins this one.

#94 Free Healthcare
The NHS is free to everyone; black, white, brown, yellow, green, puce, heliotrope, spotty, whatever.

#93 Music Piracy
We are both musicians and hate music piracy.

#92 Book Deals
Er … Neither of us has written a book so this is irrelevant.

#91 San Francisco
I want to go there; Andy has been there and loved it, the lucky bastard.

#90 Dinner Parties
We both cook extravagantly but we both prefer eating out to giving dinner parties.

#89 St. Patrick’s Day
Everybody except Americans hates the Irish (including most of the Irish).

#88 Having Gay Friends
We both have gay friends so that cancels out.

#87 Outdoor Performance Clothes
Nope. Two shrugs. We don't know what the hell that's supposed to mean. If it means sports clothing on non-sportspeople, that's a Chav thing, restricted to scum and criminals.

#86 Shorts
A big shake of the head from both of us. No way.

#85 The Wire
Again, we have no idea what that is.

#84 T-Shirts
Both of us have a collection of crap teeshirts which we wear at every opportunity.

#83 Bad Memories of High School
I loved school. So did Andy. We got to hang around with schoolgirls all day and have sex with some of 'em; what's not to love?

#82 Hating Corporations
I'm a Marxist. Andy's an African. We both hate corporations.

#81 Graduate School
We don't have that here. Nor in Ghana.

#80 The Idea of Soccer
There's an idea? It's the most boring, infantile and pathetic game in the world. Andy likes Chelsea, though, so this is one up for black against white.

#79 Modern Furniture
You've seen my furniture. It's OLD. Andy's too.

#78 Multilingual Children
We were both multilingual children.

#77 Musical Comedy
Nope. That's a gay thing.

#76 Bottles of Water
Never. We both drink filtered tap water.

#75 Threatening to Move to Canada
I once had a bass player who emigrated to Canada. He was Welsh, though, so what the fuck did he know about anything?
Nope. Neither Andy nor myself like the cold that much. And I need an ocean between me and the Great Satan.

#74 Oscar Parties
Another gay thing.

#73 Gentrification
We hate the gentry.

#72 Study Abroad
Andy cheated this one as he's Ghanaian.

#71 Being the only white person around
I win one! I'm the only white person here and Andy's the only black person.

#70 Difficult Breakups
I thought I'd win this one hands down, but Andy's had his share, too. Not an exclusively white thang.

#69 Mos Def
We have no idea what that means. Is it a typo?

#68 Michel Gondry
Another double blank here. Who the fuck is that?

#67 Standing Still at Concerts
Sheeit no! We are groovy fuckers!

#66 Divorce
That's kinda international, surely.

#65 Co-Ed Sports
What, like mixed mud-wrestling? Yeah, we'd both go for that!

#64 Recycling
I am the compost master! Andy lives in a flat so just can't compete, though he does recycle all he can.

#63 Expensive Sandwiches
We both eat sushi or noodles at lunchtime. If we're going to get a sarnie it will be a cheapie from Hope's Sandwich bar.

#62 Knowing What’s Best for Poor People
Having lots of money is best for poor people. We both agree on that one.

#61 Bicycles
We are both mad cyclists.

#60 Toyota Prius
Shit! We both wish we could afford one!

#59 Natural Medicine
Yup. We both like homeopathy and acupuncture.

#58 Japan
Andy, you BASTARD!
I've been studying the language and culture for years but tomorrow Andy flies off for a six month architecture contract in Tokyo.
Bastard, bastard, bastard!
He's going to send me lots of photos of all the pretty Japanese girls he sees.
Bastard!

#57 Juno
Neither of us has seen it but we both think she looked cute on the posters.

#56 Lawyers
We both hate them with a vengeance.

#55 Apologies
Sorry, but that's another draw.

#54 Kitchen Gadgets
We are both minimalists. Good knives (I'm really into Japanese ceramic ones at the mo) and a pestle and mortar. No crappy "food processors". Gadgets are for wimps. We are macho cooks! Hee hee.

#53 Dogs
We are both cat people.

#52 Sarah Silverman
Who she?

#51 Living by the Water
We both don't think we'd survive if we couldn't walk to a river, lake or sea in a few minutes. Inland is creepy! Brrr …

#50 Irony
I love ironing.
Anyway, what the fuck is "irony" doing in an American quiz? Americans don't understand the concept. Most of them confuse it with sarcasm and those that don't simply think it's something resembling iron.

#49 Vintage
We both have a collection of vintage guitars and love vintage sports cars so again, not exclusively white.

#48 Whole Foods and Grocery Co-ops
We are both foodies.

#47 Arts Degrees
Dammit! Andy wins this one as I dropped out of my art degree to play RAWK!

#46 The Sunday New York Times
They don't sell that in my village newsagent.

#45 Asian Fusion Food
Shit. We're fussy. We go out for sushi and sashimi together but tend to avoid fusion stuff as we are snobby purists.

#44 Public Radio
We were both raised by the BBC. And we both enjoy NPR podcasts from the States.

#43 Plays
Again, we both enjoy plays.

#42 Sushi
Damned right! If we don't go for sushi at least once a week then one of us is in hospital or dead.
Damn! That's just reminded me he'll be in Tokyo for the next six months. BASTARD!!!!!

#41 Indie Music
We're both musicians and both anti-corporate so that's another subject that doesn't define "whiteness".

#40 Apple Products
I win by seven Macs and two iPods against two Macs and one iPod. Yay!
But it's still not a whitey thing.

#39 Netflix
No idea.
Anyone know what that is? Another typo?

#38 Arrested Development
Again, we've drawn a blank. Is it a band?

#37 Renovations
Shit, I stripped my first house down to the brickwork, re-wired, plumbed and plastered it and rebuilt the fucker.
Never again!
Neither of us will raise so much as a screwdriver if there's a chance we can pay some other sucker to do the work.

#36 Breakfast Places
We both love breakfasting out with friends on a weekend.

#35 The Daily Show/Colbert Report
Nope. That's passed us both by.

#34 Architecture
We are both architects, for fuck's sake.
I sit with fellow architects Andy (Ghanaian), Rupa (Indian), Luke (Nigerian) and JJ (from Essex, so probably not classifiable as human). Whitey loses out again.

#33 Marijuana
We both appreciate a toke.

#32 Vegan/Vegetarianism
I was veggie for fifteen years but I love sashimi too much so I gave it up a while back.
Andy's another seafood fan.

#31 Snowboarding
Too fucking cold. Anyone who goes skiing or snowboarding for pleasure is a fucking idiot.

#30 Wrigley Field
I know what that is! Yay! I saw it in the Blues Brothers movie.
Neither Andy or I are interested in American sports, however.

#29 80s Night
We think not.

#28 Not having a TV
I spent most of my life without one and will trash mine when the analogue signal is cut off in a year or so.
Andy doesn't have a TV.

#27 Marathons
Bollocks! We are both lazy-assed motherfuckers.

#26 Manhattan
We loved the movie. The Gershwin soundtrack is just made for a couple of jazz fiends such as ourselves.
As for the place? It's one of those places we both say we'll get to visit someday but probably won't.

#25 David Sedaris
I have only just found out who he is, thanks to you Colonial bloggers.
I gave Andy a podcast and he thinks he's funny, too.

#24 Wine
We are both pissheads.

#23 Microbreweries
Ha! I win one! I have a stash of beer from Phil's pal Mark's microbrewery. Andy will drink any old thing.

#22 Having Two Last Names
He beats me on that one. Chalk one up for Ghana against England.

#21 Writers Workshops
What do writers want with workshops? Do they have big machines to do the writing now? I don't understand.

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture
I hate "English" culture. Football and celebs? Fuck off!
Andy likes Ghanaian culture so that's another one he wins.

#19 Traveling
Bastard! He's now going to Japan! He's probably landing at Narita while you read this.

#18 Awareness
Another one that Andy wins. I never know what the fuck is going on.

#17 Hating their Parents
We both love our parents.

#16 Gifted Children
Neither of us are breeders and we both find kids annoying and irritating.

#15 Yoga
Not with my back!
Andy says no thanks, too.

#14 Having Black Friends
He wins this one, hands down. I have a fair few black and Asian friends but being born and raised in Ghana is cheating.

#13 Tea
Green. From Shizuoka. For both of us.

#12 Non-Profit Organizations
What's not to love?

#11 Asian Girls
Fuck! Why does this stupid quiz keep reminding me that by the time I get to my Japanese class tomorrow night Andy will be in Tokyo, surrounded by cute Japanese girls?
DAMMIT!

#10 Wes Anderson Movies
A shake of the head from both of us.

#9 Making you feel bad about not going outside
What? That's just plain dumb.

#8 Barack Obama
We're both rooting for him.

#7 Diversity
You know my views on this. Andy feels the same way. Damn! I can't even win THIS one!

#6 Organic Food
Who the fuck would want to put intensively grown agrochemical product in their mouths? Of COURSE we only eat organic food.

#5 Farmer’s Markets
We cruise the markets each day like the couple of faddy foodie snobs we are.

#4 Assists
What is this?

#3 Film Festivals
Ha! I win another one!

#2 Religions their parents don’t belong to
We are both fervent atheists.

#1 Coffee
Again, we always have a Joe on the go.

So …
I'm buggered if I'm going all the way through that lot to check the scores, but I'm fairly certain that on our results, more of the above are signs that you are a black architect from Ghana who plays bass guitar than that you are a whitey.

Have a go yourselves.