Unaccountably back down in the dumps.
Having managed to cheer up a bit last night, I fully expected to wake up at 4:40 this morning without my usual scream of horror at still being alive.
No such luck.
It's not the bleak suicidal despair of one of my periodic and strangely attractive black depressions; more just a general feeling of shitty blah, mingled unpleasantly with the fag end of my crappy birthday and the looming horror of the tacky commercial onslaught that is the British Christmas "Season" (gak).
Having said that, it's a lovely sunny day, Westminster is its usual chaotic and hilarious fuck up of closed roads, barricades and armed police running around like headless chickens (it's the State Opening of Parliament today … whee); lots of bored TV crews clogging up the coffee shops and blocking the pavements with boxes and wires and expensive looking tripods to kick on your way past.
And good old Red Ken (our lovely Socialist Mayor) has announced that anyone stupid enough to be still driving a 4x4 in Central London will now be charged £25 a day for being a complete arsehole.
And I've got a lovely bowl of miso soup in front of me (and haven't yet spilled it in my keyboard).
So plenty of reasons to be cheerful, but a somewhat disheartening lack of actual cheer.
Bum …
"Oh well, what the hell."*
*Try to cheer up old Dive by playing a ridiculously easy Spot That Quote.
34 comments:
Joseph Heller wishes you a better day. As does Kundera.
I know exactly how you feel today, and I'm sorry for it. I have that generalized blah feeling myself. Hope you find something to help you feel better.
Well spotted Sassy, but I would have expected no less from you.
Mr. Fluff Goes To Washington will cheer me right up,
And I hope you enjoy hating your shmoozing. The thought of you as Super Hostess Woman is somewhat alarming.
Yes, it is alarming. Thankfully there are a few like-minded schmoozer souls there. We are having a little fest Friday evening to gear us up, and there will be regular check-ins to make sure that our inner schmoozers haven't supplanted us.
Have a better one.
Dive, I'm sorry you're still down. I won't tell you to snap out of it like I did yesterday (that may have not been very nice). While I think it's good to be able to "snap out of it when you need to, I also think it's important to let yourself feel the gamut of emotions people feel. So maybe today will be just another blah day--and tomorrow will be something else.
"Cheer up my brother, live in the sunshine, we'll understand it all by and by." (old spiritual)
You know me, Robyn; I'm happy enough just being miserable.
When I do bounce back up, I usually bounce too far an become embarrassingly euphoric.
And you've already helped by bringing up old spirituals. I've just dug around for the Abyssinian Baptist Choir on my iPod. They're currently singing their outrageously over the top version of "He Comes In My Room" (not a title for Knudsen to even start thinking about).
I think a cup of tea and listening to gospel this afternoon will definitely help.
Thanks, Robyn.
blah blah.... insert well-meaning but ultimately trite and useless platitudes here... blah blah.
It's shit when you feel like this, I know.
Hee hee.
Thanks, Ms Mac.
At least you've got pretty mountains to look at. I cannot understand why you were jealous when Mr. Mac came to smelly old London.
Now I am absolutely fascinated by how a person who doesn't believe in the after life can be cheered up by listening to gospel. I know it's beautiful when it's well-done, but don't the words irritate you?
I'm a musician, Robyn.
I love great singing.
And the words are lovely.
Even though I'm no longer a believer, I am still fascinated by religion and regularly dip into my Bible, as well as the Qu'ran, the Torah, and many commentaries on them (you know my bugbear that nobody should criticise anything they don't understand).
Just because I no longer believe, doesn't mean I don't find the Beatitudes good rules for living.
The Sermon on the Mount is very probably the most beautiful thing ever written.
And the Abyssinian Baptist Choir, Mahalia Jackson and of course Aretha can leave me in tears of joy.
And how many other people do you know who have that lot on their iPod?
That makes sense, especially considering that you're a musician. Ironically, my iPod doesn't have a sing hymn, although I consider Michael McDonald's Peace from his Christmas CD one of the most beautiful hymns ever written, so there's one.
Now there's a man who can sing.
I don't have any out-and-out hymns, but I have some old bluegrass on my iPod right now, courtesy of a friend. Right now, though, I'm just listening to the Editors.
McDonald can sing; regardless, he still needs to apologize for "Yah Mo B There."
For me it's the slightly surreal Regina Spektor (go and listen to her music on her site if you haven't already). I'll get the Trachtenberg Family Slideshow Players disc back to you soon, Dive, so you can laugh once more at those very random images and words.
maybe you could use some Lexapro.. I heard it's good for the mood.
Sigh... Love Regina Spektor.
Yes indeedy, Other Girl.
The problem with a lot of really good singers is that their record companies have no idea what constitutes something worth singing.
Pea: Thank you again for Regeeeena. And if anyone hasn't experienced the Trachtenburgs, their link is on my sidebar.
Rich: the only mood altering drugs for me are caffeine, alcohol and the occasional joint.
And Sassy: Mmmmm … Regeeeeena …
this wont help but at least some photos of the subject...........Yea flat battery .....its wednesday&november&England.Par for the course?
Regards
Tony
Cheers, Tony.
Just popped over to your blogs.
Excellent stuff.
By coincidence, a friend (Hi, Michael) released an album called Cheeses of Nazareth, while recording under the name Gordon Zola and the Rock Four (that'll be lost on our Americans, who pronounce "roquefort" Roak fort - it's rock four, guys).
I'll see if I can scrounge a copy off him next time I see him and post sn mp3 or two.
seems obvious to me but maybe not
methinks dive needs to get laid
get a jump start on that euphoria...
Yup.
I've "been without" for so long now, these days I'm reduced to consulting Doctor Onan's book "Fifty Ways To Love Your Lever".
And I've got to admit, it's a lot easier on my achey old back, young Tai.
I don't know how deep your depression goes but I do know that with 'really' depressed warm bath and razor blade people no matter what nice things you tell them and how special life is they won't hear it, so I say this you you as Robyn did, "snap out of it man" , only kidding, think about the fucking rainbows and flowers or something.
If you are still awake check out my blog, you might like it.
Mmm … Liver …
Just been over to Old K's blog.
Now I'm all choked up …
If a musical architect with a cunning wit doesn't get the weeman banging doon his door what hope do the rest of us have?
Oh, no you are not.
You mean "anything that still twitches when you kick it" isn't fussy?
Tony's got it - it's the time of year.
I've only recognised it in the last couple of years. Without going into details here, you've watched me make some big decisions in areas such as work, home and relationships - usually involving tears and walking away.
When? F____g November - EVERY time. When here in Britland, the clocks change and you find yourself getting up in the cold & dark, coming home from work in the cold & dark and spending the weekend indoors.
And what were you usually doing when I had these crises? Being wonderful, but often feeling exactly the same yourself. F____g November - that's why you're feeling like you are.
Recognising that is only half the battle - it doesn't stop it.
My current theory is that daylight is 99% of the answer. If you spend lots of the weekend indoors and have been spending lunchtimes writing for us sad bastards, then "there's your answer right there" as a wise woman once said. Make yourself get outside every lunchtime. And next weekend - visit OS's Get-a-Map site, find some public rights of way close to your house and investigate them.
Peahen (I like Pea for short) seems to have a handle on this situation, and since she knows you better than the rest of us, I'd listen up.
Just getting all these comments on your post should do something nice for your psyche.
And if our comments don't do the trick, then the eye candy Knudsen has up should.
Peahen I think you are right. A lack of daylight will do it to just about anyone.
Feel better, Dive.
Excellent. That tax policy on 4X4s, if enacted here in the US would single-handedly pay for the war in Iraq and end world poverty and hunger all at the same time. Lots of assholes here in the US.
Greetings, Pilgrim.
Love "Spark of Madness".
And yes, the Green lobby over here is getting some big hits in. Hopefully some of it will spread over there as Bush stumbles off into the dustbin of history.
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