Thursday, February 14, 2008

Cynical Invective Day

What with all the Coast posts, I'd completely forgotten it was that time of year again.

What I said about it last year cannot be improved upon and bears repeating, so here it is again:
"Ugh!

Yet another Hallmark Shareholders' Smirk Like A Twat Day.
A day when I'm filled with hatred and bile toward a disgusting capitalist shithole of a company that thrives on people's guilt.
Every year sees yet more spurious Hallmark Days where we are suddenly made to feel like uncaring or uncharitable asswipes unless we cough up and pay the cock-faced Hallmark tax.
Fucking hypocritical, profiteering, wank-brained, manipulative, thieving, shit-headed, emotionally blackmailing cocksuckers!

I make no apologies for the swearfest as it's been thirty years to the day since I received a genuine Valentine's Day card and I'm in a right strop.

I'm going to go home and slam all the doors."

Right … That's cleared the air.
I'm gonna be skulking in the house today, behind locked doors. It's a leap year and I don't want any of the scary, turnip-faced local weemen proposing to me.

14 comments:

Jilly said...

Very funny - very true. to cheer you up there's a glass of very commercial champers waiting for you on Monte Carlo Daily Photo. Happy Valentine's. (I found you via Lynn's link on Cheltenham DP).

dive said...

Veuve Cliquot! Yummy!
Happy Hallmark-Tax-Day, Jilly.
I can't believe anybody can actually afford to live in Monte Carlo, so I'll keep popping back to see how you do it.

Cheltenhamdailyphoto said...

I know, Dive, isn't she lucky! I'll join you for that glass of Veuve over there.
Glad to see your vituperative valentine vermin splashing out as i expected it to be! Wouldn't be the same without Dive's antidote. he he.

dive said...

Yup. A Valentine's Day spent sipping champagne in Monte Carlo while we bitch about the world would be pretty cool.
Though I hope no more of your Daily Post crew will click the "Dive" link on your post today; they seem like such lovely people and it may traumatise them.
Hee hee.

Jules said...

Oh buggar!!!




Listen if the postman delivers a large box of phallic-shaped liqueur chocolates from PNG - just give them to your Granny!!!

dive said...

Jules: I'd have to bring her back from the dead and things always go wrong when I perform resurrection spells.
Better I eat the yummy, phallic chocolates than have the undead cluttering up my living room (again).
Happy Hallmark-Tax-Day to you and HWDB and of course Benson.

Cheltenhamdailyphoto said...

pssst! Jules! You can get phallic-shaped choc liqueurs? My life is complete.

dive said...

Women! Huh!
Hee hee.

Maria said...

Happy Valentine's Day, you handsome, silver tongued devil....

dive said...

Hee hee, Maria. Happy Valentine's Day to my favourite trio: you, Liv and Bing.

Jules said...

Lyn - a carton is winging it's way to you as we speak. hope they don't melt!!!! They are dark chocolate - is that ok - you know what they say - more the price!!!!

Dive - yeah not a good idea to disturb the dead - they get a little spooked!!!! I'm sure she would have loved them though. Would have got her moving!!!

Jules said...

Lyn - I meant... More FOR Price - oh you know!!!!

Jules said...

Lyn - I meant.....more FOR the price - you know !!!!

dive said...

One too many phallic liqueurs there, Jules?
Hee hee.