Last time out we made an utterly glorious, deliciously fatty cream-fest clam chowder; this time we shall be concentrating more on simple US health food.
The reputation of the US in the rest of the world has suffered appallingly (and rightly so) at the filthy hands of McD, KFC, Pizza Hut et al. and even last week's yummy recipe took that most healthy of foods - shellfish - and added around four million calories per serving.
So let's get simple.
Let's get healthy.
Of all the gifts the New World has given to the Old - jazz (yay), Garrison Keillor (yay, aussi), great cheesy movies, jello, fizzy drinks made almost entirely from burnt sugar, Cheez-Whiz™, Hostess Twinkies™, marshmallow Fluff™, Krispy Kremes™ … we're talking about one of the few that deserve our heartfelt thanks:
Maize.
"Indian corn".
It bears no resemblance to "corn" as we know it in the rest of the world, yet this mouthwateringly delicious, golden, sun-kissed kernel has become the basis for a myriad of healthy, nutritious dishes.
And … er …
Popcorn.
We cannot get proper popcorn in this benighted country.
For decades all we knew of "popcorn" was the horror of those repulsive chunks of polystyrene packaging smothered in "toffee" that were obtainable in cinemas for the cost of a small car.
In the past few years, "microwave popcorn" of sorts has arrived on our shores, but alas and alack - as I found to my cost - it comes in US-sized bags that are too large for my European-sized microwave and simply wedge themselves in there, distressingly unable to turn and thereby produce an unappetising mix of sticky, black, fused charcoal lumps and uncooked kernels with the added attraction when I opened the bag of causing my smoke alarm to throw a shit-fit.
Quite apart from being cuter than a basket of kittens with a ribbon on top, my yummy new girlfriend has provided the answer:
Orville Redenbacher's Gourmet Popping Corn in a "SINGLE SERVING MINI BAG"!
Woohoo!
We emaciated Brits had heard whispered rumour of the legendary Mister Redenbacher but he has proved as elusive over here as Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster and an edible American cheese.
Now I have some in my kitchen!
And being a single serving mini bag, it fits (just) inside my microwave … though it's still a bit like trying to get a Hummer into an English car park.
So … Let's don our pinnies and get cooking.
Here are the ingredients we will need.
First up, carefully peel the transparent outer skin from the bag.Once it is skinned (you can discard the skin unless you're planning to make a particularly nasty stock), you will find all manner of exciting writing.
The generous Mister Redenbacher - resplendent in a peculiarly fetching polka-dot bow tie - has thoughtfully provided the means for both Englishmen and Spaniards to read about his marvellous product.Note the helpful little picture explaining how best to listen to your corn popping by cupping one hand to your ear.
And the sensible advice that "Children should not prepare without adult supervision".
On the reverse we learn:"Do not use the popcorn button."
Which is just as well as my microwave lacks such luxuries.
Also: "Contains Hot Oil and Steam!"
Wow! Two of my favourite ingredients!
So let's pop it in the microwave (taking care to observe and obey the "THIS SIDE UP" label), set the timer for one-and-a-half minutes at full power and let it rip.
Woohoo! The joyful sound of distant machine-gun fire fills the kitchen, gradually lessening in intensity as the combatants succumb to slaughter until by the time it is finished there is only the occasional, desultory shot from the last of the wounded survivors.
Open the door …And … Golly! What magic is this?
The bag is suddenly as fat as an American!
This really must be the genuine article.
Mmm … The tasty aroma of hot oil and steam.Be careful as you open the bag, unless you want your fingerprints seared off.
I was not entirely sure what to serve this with, but it mattered not as it is quite delicious on its own (it's the low-salt variety).As for wine; the enticing "hot corn" taste is perfectly complimented by a robust red. I enjoyed this gourmet repast with a ludicrously expensive 1995 Barolo.
As it says on the packet: Enjoy!
Oh, and please note:
The phrase, "Single Serving Mini Bag" is a US term; it takes this greedy Englishman the best part of a day to get through one of these.
25 comments:
Phew!!!! you have made me exhausted reading all that, glad you enjoyed it, where was mine????
This I can cook! Me thinks I shall head out to the grocery store and get some and perhaps have my own CA Film Festival featuring movies from the 1930's. Choice of beverage: Pepsi. I only drink wine when in France, dahling.
P.S. Am I the only one who thinks portions in France have gotten larger? I am speaking of food portions . . .
grand form, sugar! grand form! xoxoxo
Oh yes the entertainer is back! And suddenly you've made me feel quite gluttonous! I simply can't fathom that tiny microwave situation. Obviously you guys don't cook entire casseroles in yours over there. teehee
I could never eat such a small amount of popcorn without needing a second mini-bag shortly after, I'm afraid. The big size does me quite proud. Quite proud indeed.
Lately I've taken to making it on my stove though. I like adding my own huge amounts of salt and even an accidental dousing of melted butter.
I can't make this very often or I would look way too American around the middle. :D
ENJOY!!
Hee, hee. I must say that I've never popped corn in the microwave. I can't bring myself to buy it that way as we can buy small bags of the actual corn to pop ourselves. I do it the old-fashioned way, in a large saucepan with a tight fitting lid. A small amount of oil in the bottom and then a small amount of corn. At the first sound of a pop, lift the saucepan from the heat and shake vigorously; place back on the heat; repeat a couple of times until all the "machine gun fire" has ceased.
Remove the lid carefully as there is bound to be one last pop and that piece of corn will fly through the air faster than superman.
You can dust the lot with icing sugar instead of salt.
I made bags and bags of popcorn for the children when they were little - saved us an enormous amount of money at the drive-in - but you've now given me a hankering for some and since I know I have corn in the pantry; guess what I'll be making later this afternoon!
Enjoy? You bet!
All the exotic dishes you cook, and this is all you come up with for the U.S.?
Well, at least you know I will be able to cook this one. : )
Hee hee. Thank you for the recipe, Mme. If I can find any bags of real popping corn over here I'll be sure and give it a go.
Have fun with your nostalgic eating!
Katherine: I still have lots of US gourmet dishes to do. I've done clam chowder and … er … microwave popcorn, but I have all sorts of other weirdness to explore.
We hear talk over here of such alien things as sassafrass and hominy grits, jambalaya, gumbo and … er … twinkies, but I have yet to discover what the heck they are, let alone make them for myself.
Next year I plan on coming over there to find out.
Hold the phone! You are really going to visit the States? The plot thickens . . . or the waistline, take your pick. ;)
Don't panic, Cali; I only need to pick up some more popcorn.
I just can't resist the lure of your mentioning Twinkies! I wouldn't try making them unless you can get the following ingredients (among others): Modified corn starch
Cellulose gum
Whey
Leavenings (sodium acid pyrophosphate, baking soda, monocalcium phosphate)
Salt
Cornstarch
Corn flour
Corn syrup solids
Mono and diglycerides
Soy lecithin
Polysorbate 60
Dextrin
Calcium caseinate
Sodium stearol lactylate
Wheat gluten
Calcium sulphate
Natural and artificial flavours
Caramel colour
Sorbic acid (to retain freshness)
Colour added (yellow 5, red 40)
For hysterical reading try the following: twinkiesproject.com
Oh, hee hee hee and hee again, Lupine Lady!
Thank you so much for this.
Fortunately, the only one of those ingredients I have in my cupboards is cornflour, so sadly I shall have to omit Twinkies from my list of things to cook.
I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the results of the experiments undertaken in the Twinkies Project.
Ah, students …
Hooray for trying out this great item from the American culinary tradition! I admit that it's one I missed for years after moving to France. My trips to the US were too few and far between to import sufficient supplies of microwave popcorn.
BUT NOW... I've discovered that in my local organic store they sell bags of corn-to-pop. So easy - just like Mme Benaut said: heavy skillet (I've only burned it in others), tight-fitting lid (preferably glass, to watch the kernels pop, and with a steam vent to keep things crispy), oil and kernels at the bottom. I preheat the skillet before adding organic sunflower oil. The only trick is getting the flame just right so as to get things hot enough but not too.
Delicious just plain - although I'm working on a way to get grated parmesan to stick.
I have a special bowl for microwave popcorn. I put in a little corn and butter and out comes popcorn that tastes much better than anything you'll make in a bag.
Stop by Baltimore when your here next year and I'll show you.
Bah! You're lying! You could eat that whole thing in a sitting, I know it. You're just being mean to the Americans.
I grew up about 20 minutes from Orville Redenbacher's town and his first factory, and they used to have a popcorn festival every year. Fun. The stuff isn't too bad with Chardonnay, either.
It's all in the presentation!
This is what we make before we go to the movies. We pop it in the microwave and it is MUCH better than that variety you get at the theater. And then, Bing shoves it into my purse because she refuses to carry one. So my purse smells like popcorn for days...
So which ones do you have: plain, butter, unsalted, sweet?
I like salted, Joy, don't know about you? Then again, I quite like the toffee-type ones now and then...oh dear now I'm fancying popcorn. I doubt I'll make it myself though, there's a great shop in Cheltenham which makes it there and then. Yum.
a twinkie is nothing more than a mini jellyroll filled with whipped heavy cream, just with a ton of chemicals. *snickering*
xoxox
Popped Corn is wonderful stuff. I'm about as round as that little puffed bag of yours. I would recommend a nice Reisling from the Finger Lakes region to accompany your minibag. We prefer Dr. Konstantin Frank's.
Hi, Kim!
Oooh! I'll have to pop into Rainbow (my organic store) and hunt around for the real thing. I already have a nice, heavy skillet with a glass lid and a steam vent so I'm eager to get started.
I like the idea of parmesan popcorn. Yummy!
T: Popcorn tasting in Baltimore sounds good to me.
Robyn: Hee hee! Me? Mean to Americans?
I'm afraid it's true; this much popcorn is too much for one sitting so I ate some of it while it was hot and left the rest to pick at later.
So cool that you're a local Orville Redenbacher girl. A popcorn festival sounds fun.
Shazza: I'll have to work on that. Maybe a side salad.
Maria: That is so funny. Sneaking real popcorn into the cinema.
Joy: It was the low-salt variety.
Hey, where have your blogs gone? I can't reach them at the moment and my emails to you keep coming back unsent, dammit!
Are you trying to tell me something? Hee hee.
Lynn: You have a popcorn shop? Cool!
Savannah: Ewww! Hee hee.
xoxox
Neetzy: Hee hee. I'm sure you're not that round! I shall have to look for US Reislings; the ones I usually get come from the Rhine, so that's a good excuse for a taste test.
I'm pretty sure I won't find Konstantin Frank's popcorn over here; we don't even have Orville Redenbacher's; my girlfriend had to bring it in for me.
Yes well it's not ALL popcorn, just an area where they make it. At least I hope it's still there. I have the craving now so I'd better get in the car.
Dang! That would have been too cool, Lynn.
Oh, well; at least you can get yours freshly made.
Enjoy!
Dr. Frank is the winemaker. Orville is the popper! Supposedly the Finger Lakes region in New York State is similar to the Rhineland in climate, soil, etc.
ok everybody, don't want to spoil the fun, but i'll go ahead and do it: i heard on the radio a couple of years ago that a guy here in the USofA had a horrible lung condition that he went to doctor after doctor to figure out. no one could come to the proper diagnosis, and none had ever seen anything like it in their entire practice. finally, he went to a doctor who asked him straight out, "do you happen to eat a lot of microwave popcorn?" "wow, funny you should ask that!" the patient replied, "i actually eat a crazy amount of it. i'd say that i've eaten at least one bag of it every day for the past 15 years. my favorite thing to do is to open up the bag straight out of the microwave and sniff the hot butter smell - i love it!" so.....it turns out...that the butter "flavor" combined with high heat and inhaled for YEARS AND YEARS by gluttonous americans can mimic a rare lung disease that's only otherwise found in...and now i'm forgetting the punch line...i think it's asbestos mines or some god-awful thing. so dive, i leave it to you to dig up this tidbit of information. it must have been on npr....national public radio. that's the only news i listen to. SO, eat your orville reddenbacher, but DON'T snort it.
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