WTF Monday

So wrong in so many ways.

Disappearing Dive

Howdy.

Many apologies for being too busy to blog at the moment. I will be back as soon as my world stops acting like a Keystone Kops movie.

In the meantime, check out Adonia's latest story, Perry, and I shall try to post another sentence when I can find enough spare time to open a book.

Back soon.

D (currently residing in Insania).

WTF Monday

Hoorah for the good folk at the University of Cambridge!

I so want one of these.

If, however, I were a parent giving this to a little kid for a science project, I think the "build a fire extinguisher" line would scare the crap out of me, especially as it comes AFTER "demonstrate various eruptions."

Making Katie's Masthead

Hey, kids! It's more Photoshop fun!

This time we're making a new masthead for Katie's blog.

She sent me this wonderful old California postcard and wanted me to change it to 'Katiefornia' and put some of her own images inside the letters.

Fun!

Hokay. First up, let's make ourselves a bit of space here.

Open up this doohickey (Canvas Size, from the Image menu).

What we want to do is shift the postcard over to the right to allow for the extra letters.

Simply click on the square with the arrow pointing to it and then type in a figure in the width box. I made it a little wider than I'd need to give me some messing around space.

Click 'Okay' and this is what you see. Lebensraum off to the left.

Next up. I selected the left hand part of the card (the C, A, L and I) and made a copy on a new layer.

After that I carefully cut around the 'O' with the lasso tool and copied that on to another new layer. You can see the layers in the floating palette in the upper right here.

I simply used the paintbrush with black and white cloned from the card to 'paint' the 'O' until it looked like an 'E'. Then I moved the 'CALI' part across to the left to make room for the new letter.

After that, a bit more dicking around with the Clone tool and we have the basic Katiefornia template. I had to warp the layers a little to get them to mesh together but it kinda worked okay.

Next up, Katie gave me a list of the images from her blog that she wanted to see inside the letters. I looked at them and tried to match the image to the shape of the letter.

This one was just right for the 'A' at the right hand end.

So … Cut around the 'A' using the lasso tool, then select the image of the waterskiers and …

… Use the 'Paste Into' tool which conveniently puts the picture of the skiers behind the postcard so it peeps through the hole you cut.

Like this.

Of course it's never the right size, so simply drag it down until it fits.

Yay, skiers!

All we've got to do now is repeat the process with the other letters, cutting around them and using 'Paste Into' to insert Katie's assorted postcards inside.

This was the first draft …

Of course, Katie - being the client - had to make a couple of changes.

She was right to do so of course and the final image looks a lot more balanced for it.

So there you have it. Now go away and play and make your own spiffy blog mastheads!

500 Words XXXIV - This Week's Sentence

This week's sentence is taken from Truman Capote's classic 'In Cold Blood'.

It is:

'While Perry waited in the car, he had gone into the hospital to try and buy a pair of black stockings from a nun.'

Ooooh … Now you know you really can't resist this one. Get jiggy with it, people.

Fuck, Yeah!

The usual grovelling apologies to the incomparable Natalie Dee for stealing another one of her drawings, but hey; I couldn't say it better myself.

The view from my bedroom window this morning

Ditto.

Spring! Enjoy!

500 Words XXXIII - Story Time

This week's sentence was taken from James Ellroy's 'The Big Nowhere'.

It was:

'Claire chain-smoked and drummed her nails on the dashboard.'

We have two Claires for you to meet this week (so far … any others are welcome to join the Claire-a-thon).

Adonia's 'Part IV: Haddy C. McPherson'

Ah, Haddy Claire … From scary old lady to someone suddenly warm and real. Lovely writing, Adonia.

Dive's 'Claire'

Goodness knows where this came from. I suddenly realised when Adonia sent me her story that it was Thursday afternoon already and I'd not written a thing, so please forgive the unedited stream of consciousness of a ten minute, type-it-and-run job.

And also please forgive the weird font sizes my posts have started coming in. I don't seem to be able to do anything about that. Hey ho.

WTF Easter Monday

Yay, Katie, for finding this cute little fella in the Dollar Store.

I wonder what "Hollow Milk" tastes like.

500 Words XXXIII - This Week's Sentence

This week's sentence is taken from James Ellroy's 'The Big Nowhere'.

It is:

'Claire chain-smoked and drummed her nails on the dashboard.'

You've got your assignment. Now go do that voodoo that you do so well.

500 Words XXXII - Story Time

Hokay, so it's a day late but I was too busy to even think, let alone read and write.

Here goes (at last):

This week’s sentence was taken from L. Frank Baum’s ‘The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz’.

It was:
‘Not a tree nor a house broke the broad sweep of flat country that reached to the edge of the sky in all directions.’

Some goodies to enjoy with your coffee this week. Adonia's little Jake is definitely one to watch, Lulu reminisces deliciously and Old Dive retreats into his Norfolk childhood.

Adonia's 'Part III: My Boy Jake'

Yikes! There's a definite edge creeping into Adonia's Jake stories. I can feel something big coming and I'm pretty sure I want to be hiding behind the sofa when it gets here.

Shivery stuff.

Lulu's 'Little Apple'

Ah, the ache of age. Lulu's story this week hits that ache hard with some wonderfully real writing about … well … certainly not about what it's like to be over fifty, darn it.

Dive's 'Prelude To An Incident On Somerleyton Marshes'

If you're a little kid who likes to get out into the countryside and is prone to daydreaming, Norfolk's a pretty good place to grow up in.

Enjoy!