Yesterday Phil drove me to hospital where the lens that had served my right eye faithfully (if defectively) for the past 52 years was destined for the slop bucket.
After a shedload of tests, some unashamedly pathetic middle-aged flirting with the hot nurses and the anointing of my forehead with an enormous magic marker arrow pointing to my right eye (everyone due for a cataract op had one of these … we sat around comparing arrows while we waited as that was more entertaining than the magazines on offer) I was led into the operating theatre.
After a few eye drops, including an iodine one ("Oooh! It's all gone yellow! Trippy!") they sat me down in a big ol' dentist chair thang and wound it down until I was laying flat on my back with my head clamped in a rather comfortable set of pads. Then they slapped a mask over my face and ripped open an eyehole in it before sticking my eyelids open so I couldn't blink.
After that, a nurse held my hand (you have to squeeze their hand if you feel you're gonna sneeze - not a wise option when someone is cutting your eyeball open). Unfortunately I got Nurse Tim rather than hot nurses Emma and Judith. Hey ho.
And then they shone a bright light in my eye and this is all I saw for the next twenty minutes. Actually, this is a photo of a lightbulb that I dicked around with in Photoshop but it's pretty close to what you actually see during a cataract op if anyone's interested. I'm rather proud of how accurate it is (the darker smudge in the lower left is the surgeon's hand ).
There was one unnerving moment when the whole thing blossomed red but they washed the blood off and carried on.
What happens is the doctor slices into your eyeball (try not to sneeze) and inserts an ultrasound doohickey that sounds like a speeded up dentist's drill. This gradually breaks up your lens and they flush it all away. While that was happening the white light got more and more blurry until at last all I could see was white.
Then the doctor inserts a new lens and things get seriously weird for a few seconds while your brain tries to adjust. And suddenly it's all over and you can see a ring of grinning faces and a big ol' lamp.
So anyhoo … Here I am trying to cope with the fact that my right eye cannot see through my glasses any more and I cannot have a new prescription made up for six weeks: the time it takes for my new lens to fully settle in. But at least after that period I'll be able to see again. Woohoo!
The computer screen is glary as hell so I'll post this and turn the damned thing off
18 comments:
Well this is a surprise. Glad it turned out so well (you actually sound as if you enjoyed the whole thing?)
All the best for speedy recovery x
Thanks, Pea! It's another sign of getting older. Hey ho.
While I didn't actually enjoy the experience there was no pain (surprising as there was no anæsthetic) and the most annoying after effect is that the stupid eyepatch I have to wear for two weeks at night jabs my nose when I turn over in my sleep and wakes me up.
I came all the way over here from Facebook expecting to wretch, but it's not really so bad, and you'll be so happy with your vision once your eye is all healed. Here's a dumb question—is the color different because that eye is dilated more than the other, or are you going to look like one of those cats with two different eye colors from now on?
Eye stuff is creepy isn't it?! I'm sorry you had to do that but so glad it is over and that cataracts is such a reliable fix! I've heard if you have that surgery to correct your vision that you can't do the cataract surgery later when you need it so that sounds a bit iffy.
I feel like we should have known about this before you went in but I know you like to surprise us with shocking news. baha I like that you are totally dressed up to go under the bright lights and knives. :D
I had around six laser procedures to the backs of my (diabetic) eyes while pregnant with G and it was so unsettling to watch the giant needle come right for my eye to numb it up!! SO GLAD you didn't have to do that!! The front of the eye is so nicely numb-able as watching the surgery is bad enough!!
Hope you don't get too headachy waiting for your new glasses. :(
Hi, Robyn. That's not a dumb question; it's a really smart one. No, the eye colours are the same but the colours I actually perceive are different. When I close each eye in turn one seems greenish and the other pinkish. It will take my brain a while to adjust.
I must confess to liking the cool "David Bowie eyes" effect the dilated pupil gives me but that will only last another day or so.
Shan, eye stuff is certainly creepy and I must confess to being a leetle nervous before the op, but thankfully with no reason.
Oh, yikes! The sound of that giant needle is scary as heck. I hope you never have to go through that again.
So far no headaches, but I'm seeing my optician (optometrist in the US?) tomorrow to get some advice on the next few weeks.
Eeeek! Eye surgeries freak me the hell out. I'm glad you're okay.
Thanks, Vanda. My eye is okay, it's just the rest of me that's a steaming heap of crap. Un-hoorah for getting older.
Un-hoorah indeed!! :D
Even though you made this sound like a walk in the park I hope I never have to do it. I'm glad you're feeling fine and big, big thanks to Phil.
My WV is "hypoo." That's for Shan.
Well, you definitely don't need any handsome tickets! I hope that the iris returns soon, hee hee, so you have two blue eyes again :)
Just showed Ian your photo in large size and he asked me to send you his best regards. He is off to get the whipper snipper fixed and is in a hurry, otherwise no doubt he would have sent you a message himself.
Wow! I'm glad the surgery went well. It's a drag not to be able to see well, but at least it's a temporary condition.
Well, you know your friends in Blogville are wishing you a full and quick recovery.
Take care this morning and let me know when you get home again!
This post took me back to my eye op... oh dear hope you have inherited some good things from me and not all bad!
Shan: it's a great word.
Petrea, yes thank you, I am feeling much better already, if a little fuzzy.
Hee hee, Mme. Thank you. The iris is already back to normal so no more cool "David Bowie" eyes for me. And it means I can look at my monitor again without flinching at the glare.
Give my best to Ian. Getting ones whipper-snapper fixed sounds pretty drastic. I'm sitting here with my legs crossed trying not to think about it!
Ms.M: Thank you. Yes, it's temporary and mercifully has not yet caused me any eyestrain headaches. The prospect of being able to see properly again gives me yet another reason to say "Roll on Spring."
Mum: I'm glad to report that cataract surgery has come on in leaps and bounds over the last few years. If you need your other eye done you need no longer worry about stitches and all the other hassle they put you through.
How many fingers am I holding up?
Eleven?
Hope you can see better! My hubby is a specialist for the visually impaired so I'm used to weird eye stuff.
Things are still a little fuzzy, Neetzy (and sore in the mornings) but it's a definite improvement.
And yes, eye stuff is weird, especially when it is happening to you.
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