I hadn't checked my own site stats for months, but when I got home I signed in and was delighted to see my Colonial and European Blogville neighbours' calling cards and even one from Chad. Of course, there were unexplained lurkers in such places as Cambodia, Brazil and - weirdest of all - Canada, and I assume that those are the ones who typed the following phrases into Google to end up on my blog.
If any of my Blogville neighbours want to fess up to using any of these search terms, the time to come clean is now.
Oh, and today, so far we've had people looking for "Sheep lungs" and "UFO nipples."
Human beings are really scary.
22 comments:
Goodness how strange, hope I do not get many of those on my stat counter!
LOL You know who it is reading you from Chad, sugarplum, don't you? xxoxoxo
Mum, that's the joy of having a nerd counter.
Savannah, I do indeed and I was most delighted to see that little flag pop up.
xoxoxoxo
LMAO! I have to get one of those for my Blogger account. I've got one for my Wordpress sites, but the search terms are not nearly as amusing.
I might try searching for alien nipples and see if you come up on my radar, Dive.
By the way, you mom is WAY cool! My mom won't even use email.
Sheep lungs - haggis?
I have to get me one of these.
Katerine, Mum is fun, yes indeedy. As for alien nipples, I suppose having written long ranty posts full of crap and weirdness since 2006 there are bound to be a lot of unusual words on the blog for those search engines to pick up on.
Well spotted, Vanda. Though I'd have searched for haggis, but then I'm way more "normal" than most interweb users.
I'm surprised at what comes up for searches on my site, and I tend to be "normal," meaning bland, with nothing I think would be of interest to people with more unusual tastes. However, I was dismayed at some of the countries which looked at my site, known for free-wheeling kiddie porn, so I've done what I can to lock my site down. Those countries have disappeared from my stats. Now if I only knew how to watermark my images, I'd be alot more comfortable.
Speedway, I think the only way to avoid perverts looking at your site is never to post anything.
I have no idea how to watermark images but I assume there must be something in Photoshop that does it.
I laughed at the caning of girls...
The biggest hit I ever had on my blog was when I posted about peeing in my pants at the doctor's office. Good hell, I think I had over 2000 readers that day and they all got to my site with phrases like "pissing her knickers" and "help me! I just pissed my panties!"
I also get the crazies. Some of them, I honestly don't know how they got to me. Like one dude was looking for "young girls kissing black asses."
What the fuck was THAT all about? And how did that get them to the post about Liv and her friends going ice skating?
Happy Christmas to you, you dear old dude. From the old prairie woman.
People really are scary. I get a lot of hits for Trail bologna, which is odd enough, but I also gets hits from people searching for Cindy Loo Who. I thought that was the Grinch version, but there's a porn star named Cindy Loo. Yuck.
Who is Charlie Dimmock? Does he live in Chad?
This list is like a "found" poem -- written by someone using recreational drugs.
I have a stats counter, but I went for the free version, which doesn't list search terms. Maybe it's better not to know :-)
Petrea ..Charlie Dimmock is a lady, well not sure if that is the right term as she is a gardener and rather buxom, she was on TV a lot and she can do most jobs any man can do!
Happy Christmas, Old Prairie Woman! I think the embarrassment (and the fun) comes from Google's way of searching for key words rather than phrases. We've both written so many years' worth of words that it's inevitable - if unfortunate - that the crazies will be pointed our way. I, for instance, have never written about the caning of girls; I just typed it into my blog search and it came up with no results. I do, however, plead guilty to UFO moonbase girls (an old TV memory post) and "Charlie Dimmock hot" when laughing at my neighbour for calling his cats Charlie and Fern after Charlie Dimmock and Fern Britton, two of the least "hot" women on English telly.
It's a funny old life.
Oh, Robyn; now I'm going to be stuck for ever with the horrific image of Cindy Loo Who doing porn.
AUGH!
Petrea, Charlie Dimmock is a large, muscular woman who used to do gardening shows on the telly without a bra on. It was a horrible sight but apparently there is a market for that sort of thing.
And no, she doesn't live in Chad; that honour goes to another Blogville neighbour.
Ms.M. you should sign up to StatCounter. All this stuff is free on there. You're right; it occasionally throws up some inspirational imagery.
Mum, she could lay slabs, dig drainage ditches and put up sheds as well as anyone but why the hell couldn't she wear a bra while she was doing it. Eww!
HA HA If you do not know why she did not wear a bra, wow where is your imagination!
Hiding behind the sofa. That woman was enough to put a man off boobs for ever.
I know it's late afternoon in England but you two are a good morning laugh with my coffee!
Oooh, coffee … If I brew up now, will I be able to sleep tonight? Ah, what the hell; let's go for it.
I usually have an afternoon cup at around 4:00. Call it my tea, if you like, although I'd be thrilled to trade my cup for a perfect British tea shop with strong, black tea and one of those 3-tiered plates of goodies.
They still exist, Petrea. The Norwich Cathedral tea room is where I go to get my fix of grandmother's specials. Beautiful tea and glorious home-baked cakes and old-fashioned goodies in a thousand year old building. Spiffy.
Make a note of it, please. Someday we'll visit. (That's more of a threat than a promise, but we're saving.)
Tea at the Cathedral is on the list, Petrea.
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